If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize