dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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