Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
