I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize