Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
please come you make the beer taste better
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
