either way he was missing a nipple.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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