Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): We made it safely. Thanks for the call though. http://tfl.nu/g3rc
  Replies (12) Good night (1261) Bad night (1318)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking... http://tfl.nu/p911
  Replies (9) Good night (1003) Bad night (4736)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila. http://tfl.nu/p50o
  Replies (10) Good night (4875) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now. http://tfl.nu/rvu6
  Replies (10) Good night (4226) Bad night (1082)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life. http://tfl.nu/md1r
  Replies (10) Good night (1724) Bad night (5325)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past. http://tfl.nu/eita
  Replies (4) Good night (2622) Bad night (1889)
• Favorite

  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+64): I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable. http://tfl.nu/t0un
  Replies (4) Good night (2476) Bad night (1166)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine. http://tfl.nu/200d
  Replies (6) Good night (2147) Bad night (698)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword. http://tfl.nu/ec7y
  Replies (1) Good night (1004) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012. http://tfl.nu/82uc
  Replies (5) Good night (1050) Bad night (524)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails? http://tfl.nu/r64b
  Replies (2) Good night (901) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on http://tfl.nu/z8s8
  Replies (4) Good night (604) Bad night (439)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery. http://tfl.nu/qyfd
  Replies (2) Good night (447) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far http://tfl.nu/o8xj
  Replies (1) Good night (406) Bad night (125)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere. http://tfl.nu/o1rp
  Replies (4) Good night (503) Bad night (96)

Randomize