if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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