I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
