definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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