my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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