I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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