So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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