Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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