Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My breasts were aching with rage.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
