this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He passed out mid-signature
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize