I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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