He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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