Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize