I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize