No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
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