Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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