I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
