Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
