You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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