Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
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