I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
