what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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