sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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