Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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