i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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