Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
only if we run a train.
done.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
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