Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
