Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I need a burrito and a hug.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
