walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
