So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
She announced her abortion via fbk
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
