Yo dont text me then not text me
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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