I bet he comes in French.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
