why didn't you poke me back
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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