she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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