Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
People with herpes should wear stickers.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I queefed so loud it echoed.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize