I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
