dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
