We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
