did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
