this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize