I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
