Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(408): View more from California

carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.

(415): View more from California

be there in 3 mins

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(408): carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit. (415): be there in 3 mins http://tfl.nu/00q0

Replies (26) Good night (3542) Bad night (651)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.

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(570): If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid. http://tfl.nu/ujtp

Replies (16) Good night (823) Bad night (3453)
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(408): View more from California

You drunk yet?

(925): View more from California

Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.

(408): View more from California

Cant make any promises.

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(408): You drunk yet? (925): Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them. (408): Cant make any promises. http://tfl.nu/jm9i

Replies (9) Good night (4754) Bad night (610)
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(314): View more from Missouri

who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...

(1-314): View more from Missouri

I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.

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(314): who the fuck is that kid sitting with you... (1-314): I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out. http://tfl.nu/gjl6

Replies (15) Good night (1089) Bad night (4720)
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(516): View more from New York

OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM

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(516): OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM http://tfl.nu/ckuz

Replies (34) Good night (7928) Bad night (1789)
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(418): View more from Quebec

You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"

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(418): You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry" http://tfl.nu/nwle

Replies (11) Good night (6929) Bad night (1082)
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(716): View more from New York

your facebook page is a work of drunk art.

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(716): your facebook page is a work of drunk art. http://tfl.nu/2ehc

Replies (3) Good night (3658) Bad night (822)
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(630): View more from Illinois

I wonder if you can snort coke upside down

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(630): I wonder if you can snort coke upside down http://tfl.nu/eyfv

Replies (20) Good night (1404) Bad night (2998)
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(705): View more from Ontario

I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out

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(705): I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out http://tfl.nu/lvnp

Replies (5) Good night (2442) Bad night (986)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.

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(203): My vagina is depressed thinking about her future. http://tfl.nu/t288

Replies (11) Good night (856) Bad night (2297)
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(804): View more from Virginia

Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.

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(804): Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed. http://tfl.nu/0qnd

Replies (6) Good night (1609) Bad night (642)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.

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(701): She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv. http://tfl.nu/rbou

Replies (8) Good night (1833) Bad night (619)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.

(803): View more from South Carolina

Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.

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(910): Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down. (803): Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you. http://tfl.nu/a5n4

Replies (8) Good night (1765) Bad night (767)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.

(1-402): View more from Nebraska

Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.

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(402): He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is. (1-402): Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors. http://tfl.nu/lcrs

Replies (6) Good night (1696) Bad night (493)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.

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(617): The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie. http://tfl.nu/3kb9

Replies (16) Good night (1304) Bad night (515)

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