So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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