You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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