New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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