I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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